Two off the list!

Written on May 10, 2012 by Miss Myla in goals, grownup business, losing it

You probably don’t remember, but in the Fall of 2009, I wrote my 5-year plan and it went a little something like this:

1. Graduate at Clark College (a junior college).
2. Lose 100 pounds.
3. Have a baby.
4. Graduate at Washington State University.
5. Move to the other Vancouver (British Columbia).

The last time I checked something off of the list (#1), I mentioned that #5 was no longer an option. I know now that I can change that to NY instead of BC (the point was to leave the Portland/Vancouver area anyway). And seeing that I’m hell bent on crossing off #2 and #3, I can confidently say that 2012 is the year of the impossible force known as Myla.

When it comes to weight loss, I’ve always been afraid of posting any before and after photos of my progress because what would happen when I inevitably fell back into my ways and gained it all back? However, this past week, I decided to do it. I sat there with my mouse over the upload button for quite some time before I got the nerve to do it, but I’m definitely glad I did. Not because of the compliments and words of encouragement, but because now I’m accountable. I have to stick to my guns and keep going.

When I posted the photos, I was asked how I did it, but before I answer that, I want to address the why. At the beginning of this year, I was acutely aware that my life would be changing this year whether I wanted it to or not. Eduardo was in New York, so that meant that I had to permanently join him at some point. Additionally, I would be graduating in May and, with my drive, my photography would be taken to a whole new level. All of this sounds like a bunch of grown-up business, and because it is grown-up business, I figured that it was time to do just that… grow up. I have no excuses now to not work on my health and to give Eduardo the family that he so desperately wants. He’s given so much to me over the years (can you believe that we’ve been together for 11 years now?) that it’s really the least that I can do for him. So, that’s why. I’ve been told time and time again that if I want to have babies, I’m going to have to lose the weight. So, I am.

I’ve mentioned in the past that my battles with weight-loss have been lost because of my love for food. I’m a foodie. Not only will I try almost anything, I really enjoy my food. Do you enjoy your food? Or do you just eat to eat? Because I enjoy my food. That said, I can’t give it up. I can’t restrict the kinds of food that I eat. I’ve finally come to grips with that. So, to lose the weight, I’ve made some concessions… eat a little less of it (it’s amazing what using small plates and bowls will do) and move more. I was actually really inspired by Andie Mitchell’s story, which reminds me a lot of The Tortoise & The Hare or The Little Engine That Could. Moderation and perseverance. The concept was simple enough, I just had to figure out how to fit it into my life. I’m not counting calories or carbs, that’s a horrendous thing to do. I’m not forcing myself to workout. I’m not even eating completely healthy meals all the time (my fingers still smell of the truffle fries that I had on the way home from my wax appointment). I’m just not over-eating (which I know exactly where it stems from… thanks Mom) and taking the stairs when I can. It’s amazing what a little can do if you do it consistently.

If that before & after picture doesn’t do it for you, I just pulled out my favorite pair of pants that I haven’t been able to wear since 2006. And guess what… they fit! Anyway, if I keep at it, I’ll be crossing off the last 3 things on my list by the end of this year.

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What? It’s April?

Written on April 2, 2012 by Miss Myla in jet set

I have been MIA (at least as far as this blog is concerned). I have good reason though. School, work, travel, photography… it’s all wearing me thin. February started the ball rolling with WPPI, a crazy/fantastic experience that I should really write a whole post on. It was followed closely by my birthday in March. And now, Paris is just a week away. At this exact time a week from now, I will be flying over the Atlantic (or maybe just over Europe) for the very first time in my life… it’s crazy. I’m spending all my time obsessively looking through TripAdvisor and whatever else I can feast my eyes on that have to do with Paris. I’m scared, excited, and on the verge of barfing. It’s a good feeling.

Anyway, I just check-in. I miss this.

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Hello there, 2012. Nice to meet you.

Written on January 2, 2012 by Miss Myla in goals, Holidays, jet set

The whole big New Year’s Eve celebration hasn’t been a fun thing for me since high school. Nevertheless, I still like to take the time to reflect on the year a little and make plans for the upcoming one.

If you’re a regular reader, you know that I don’t make resolutions. Rather, I list my intentions for the year. Last year, my intentions were to stay on top of my studies (semi-fail), break from my shell (another semi-fail), keep my creative juices flowing (complete fail), and see the world (semi-fail). Okay, so I didn’t do as well as I thought I would, but life happens and the powers that be intended for other things to happen in my life.

Highlights of 2011:

My 30th birthday was the most memorable by far! At the stroke of midnight, I was floating in the middle of a pool located (literally) next to the Caribbean, looking up at the stars, with a glass of champagne in my hand. I will never forget that moment.
Eduardo’s decision to go after a job on the East Coast has definitely changed our lives. In a matter of months, our lives were changed and we’ve been going through one of the toughest tests of our marriage. Thanks to technology and our frequent flier miles, we’ve been able to manage quite nicely.
Eduardo’s going away party/32nd birthday party was another highlight because I was really happy for everyone that came by to see Eduardo off. Some we see all the time, some we see only on big occasions, and some I haven’t seen in over 10 years!
To end the year, my Christmas wish came true… I finally made it to New York City. I’ll probably dedicate a whole blog post to our trip down there, but I can say that it was absolutely amazing.

So what’s in store for 2012? A lot of change.

Paris in April.
Graduate from WSU.
Move to New York.
Expand Cheeky to New York (and maybe get my own studio).
Greece, Spain, and London in September.

Of those listed, aside from moving, getting Cheeky up and running on the East Coast has been at the forefront of my mind. It’s really scary moving to a place where you don’t know anyone, but starting a business in a place where you don’t know anyone is much scarier. I have plans to help me on my way, but it’s the fear of the unknown that’s got me. Thank goodness I’ve got a backup plan.

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Wanderlust

Written on November 23, 2011 by Miss Myla in jet set

In case you weren’t aware, I’m graduating in May. As long as I don’t decide to get my Master’s, this will be my absolute last semester in school… something I’ve been looking forward to for the past 10 years. While this is all great news, the finality of it all and the impending “time for the real world” is getting to me. There are still things I want to do before I grow up.

So, I’m dedicating 2012 to my wanderlust. Thankfully, I was able to arrange my last semester so that I would only be taking online courses, so I’ll be able to pick up at the drop of a dime and leave to wherever my heart takes me. So far, I’ve got Vegas in February for a photography convention, Paris in April for a photography workshop (plus a week and a half for wandering), and two months in Spain during the summer for my graduation present. Come September, I will have hopefully calmed my travel bug, at least for a little while. Then, I can start to worry about all the important things (like moving to New York and finding work).

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Baby, it’s cold outside.

Written on November 18, 2011 by Miss Myla in craptastic

And so it begins… Winter in the Pacific Northwest. It’s been cold, gray, rainy, and windy for the past week or so now. This means no sun for the next 8 months.

What this also means is that I will not be in a particularly good mood for the next 8 months. Seasonal depression? Maybe. I just don’t think that the weather necessarily contributes to a motivating environment. I have my projects, work, and school to keep me busy; however, I’m already feeling the effects of crappy weather. Take, for example, the past two days. I have been a complete mess! Anything and everything is making me cry. I cried while watching the news because I was embarrassed by the Occupy Portland shenanigans (note: I get it, it’s all unfair, but it’s the hippy, homeless dumbf*ks who are ruining it for the whole movement). Then, later, I was watching Law & Order: SVU and I started crying because the stupid new detective lady wasn’t believing the rape victim on the show. Even later yet, I was snuggling on the couch with the dogs and I started crying because they were just too adorable. Oh, and don’t get me started on all the cutie-patooties I run across on Pinterest every day.

Maybe it’s hormones? I don’t know. I just want this next week to go by fast. Eduardo’s due to come home on Thanksgiving. Maybe the distraction will calm my emotions.

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Get ready, East Coast!

Written on October 13, 2011 by Miss Myla in jet set

One week from this exact moment, I will be at PDX, getting ready to head out East. It was supposed to be a surprise (Eduardo thought I was coming in on the 28th), but his co-worker asked him to help him move next weekend. I didn’t want Eduardo to be the douche-bag that leaves his friend hanging at the last minute (I know how crappy moving is), so I had to tell him I was coming in earlier than expected. Gah. I was so disappointed, but Eduardo was super excited, so whatever.

I’ll be in New York for 12 days. The first weekend, we’re going to head up to Montreal (where, apparently, it is foie gras heaven!). I love BC so much, so I’m excited to see another part of Canada. Then, my last weekend there, we’re going to spend Halloween weekend in Boston and Salem. I’ve never been much of a Halloween person, but going to the birthplace of Halloween… sounds pretty cool. I’m hoping to get some really good (creepy) pictures.

What I’m looking forward to most (aside from being with Eduardo, of course) is the food. Every restaurant I’ve researched in Montreal has foie gras, which I’ve been OBSESSED with since our dinner at Alan Wong’s in Honolulu. Hell, they’ve got foie gras poutine! Two of my most favorite things put together! My mouth is watering just thinking about it. Unfortunately, it sounds like I’ll be missing lobster season by a hair. I guess that’ll have to wait until next summer.

One more week. Until then… I’ll be dreaming of you, foie gras!

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Wait a minute Mr. Postman!

Written on October 4, 2011 by Miss Myla in jet set, u+me=us

Last week’s highlight came in the form of a handwritten letter from Eduardo. It was awesome for a variety of reasons, but the top 2 came down to (1) Who really writes snail mail these days? and (2) Eduardo wrote with no prodding from me. Since then, we’ve been writing back and forth, which slightly reminds me of a cheesy Nicholas Sparks movie. But despite the cheesiness of it all, it’s pretty great. He writes about stuff like burps and old farts that he meets at WalMart, and I write about the woes of school and work.

Anyway, the countdown has begun. In a few weeks, I’ll finally be on my way to the East Coast. This, too, is awesome for a variety of reasons: (1) I get to see Eduardo, (2) This will be my first time to the East Coast, (3) Apparently, there’s this fancy-schmancy restaurant that Eduardo’s planning on taking me to that has a foie gras of the day (something I’ve been OBSESSED about since dining at Alan Wong’s in Honolulu). I just hope that Eduardo’s apartment will be ready by then. It was supposed to have been ready mid-September, but due to construction, they’ve pushed it out to October 21st. So, right now, he’s staying at a motel close to work. And regardless of how much he says that it’s nice, I’m not staying in a motel.

In other news, 2012 is shaping up to be even more awesome than snail mail and my first East Coast trip. February is WPPI in Vegas, followed by Paris in April for a boudoir workshop with The Boudoir Divas, followed by graduation in May, followed by Chicago in May, and finally, Spain for 2 months during Summer. Needless to say, I’m pretty stoked!

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Incomplete

Written on September 24, 2011 by Miss Myla in craptastic

I don’t know how many times I’ve sat down to write this, and every time I do, I can’t get past the first sentence without completely breaking down in tears. But here I am, for the 15th time, hoping that by me getting all of this out, I’ll be able to shed all (or, at least, most) of this sadness so that I can get back to some sense of normalcy.

Obviously, Eduardo’s gone. A week ago tonight, I was standing outside airport security, watching him leave me behind. Honestly, in the days and hours prior to his departure, I thought I’d be able to hold myself together just fine. Sure, he was leaving, but we’d get to see each other again. But, sure enough, as soon as it got close for him to head off to his gate, I was a complete mess. He said good-bye to his family and they were great enough to give us some space to say good-bye to each other.

The clock was ticking and I could barely let go. I was on the verge of making a total fool of myself and begging him to stay. For a split second, after he got through security, I thought that he was going to do a 180 and walk back out. But he didn’t. He was gone.

Thankfully, I had my girls waiting for me for a quite girl’s night in. However, since that night, I haven’t been able to get myself out of the house except for to go to work and school. It’s tough enough having to say that I’m okay when my classmates or co-workers ask how I’m doing (when, of course, I’m really not okay), so I can’t even imagine how tough it would be to pretend around people that actually matter to me. So, instead, I’ve opted to become somewhat of a hermit.

The longest that we’ve been apart from each other was 1 month, shortly after we got married. And while we will be able to see each other at least once a month, the difference here is that I know that he’s not coming back. New York is his home now.

Being apart from him is a lot tougher than I had ever thought (and it’s only been a week). Sure, we talk every day via phone or video chat, but it’s not the same. I hate to be “that girl”, but I need him here with me.

Don’t get me wrong, though. I’m not mad that he’s gone. This is an amazing opportunity and I wouldn’t change it for anything. I’m just mad at the timing of it all. If I didn’t have school to finish, I’d be there with him in the blink of an eye. I’m the one that’s been dreaming of New York (granted, NYC and not upstate NY), and he’s the one that’s always wanted to settle down here in the Pacific Northwest. He’s making my dreams come true, and there’s no way I can be mad at that.

The worst thing, aside from actually being apart from each other, are all the comments like “Time will fly…” or “Absence makes the heart grow fonder…” Blah Blah Blah. Another reason to lock myself away from other people.

Anyway. That’s me for now. Sad Miss Myla.

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Here goes nothing…

Written on August 13, 2011 by Miss Myla in grownup business

I’m back from our Hawai’i vacation, and rather than be relaxed and rejuvenated, I’m nervous, sad, and a complete mess. See, that big, life-changing news I was talking about? Well, Eduardo was offered a job in upstate New York… and he has accepted it. This summer has been a big blurb of decision-making. Should he apply for the job? Should he accept it if it’s offered to him? Do I postpone my Senior year of college to move with him? Or do I stay behind, finish my last year of school, and then move East? After a lot of going back and forth, we’ve decided on me staying here and him going there.

At first, I thought that the year apart would be a breeze. We’d talk often, Skype, fly out to see each other. Then the day before vacation, I was sitting at work, a Duffy song started playing on my Pandora playlist, and BAM!… I started bawling my eyes out. Then, days into our vacation, he kissed me, and I lost it. Last, but not least, we were on the plane heading back home, we looked at each other and we both started crying. I know this is just the beginning, and I have no idea how we’re going to get through this.

In the end, it’ll be worth it. It’s an opportunity of a lifetime for Eduardo, and it’s the change that I’ve been itching for. Just one more year (this is quickly becoming my mantra).

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Summer, Summer, Summertime

Written on July 10, 2011 by Miss Myla in Uncategorized

You can complain about the hippies, hipsters, and rain, but Portland in Summer doesn’t get any better. I might go so far as to say that my spirits have lifted because of it. But I’ll stop talking about it because I may jinx it.

Anyway, as usual, there are big changes coming our way (no, nothing to do with babies). Within the next week, we’ll know whether our lives will change (for the better, I hope). Right now, there’s a lot of anxiety about what is going to happen, or even if it’s going to happen. So, the fact that we’re going to find out soon will be a big relief.

In other news, my sister is getting married in 3 weeks, and the weekend following the wedding, Eduardo and I will be on our way to what will probably be our last Hawaii vacation in a long, long time. What this means is that we’re going to try and pack in as much as we can into those 7 days (most of it having to do with food).

Well, until we hear about our big news, that’s all I have.

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